#grow – inside her broken mind

Maturity

Age does not define how mature you are. Maturing is more than growing physically or aging, it also speaks to maturing in our thought process and emotional growth. I have known persons who are eighteen or twenty who are more rounded and mature than persons in their late twenties or thirties and on ward.

Sometimes society over looks these key component of the term mature, and would want to, dear I say, silence people merely because of age. I have been truly blessed to have a mixture of friends ranging from teenagers to adults. These teenagers and young adults can for sure work amongst who we term “adults”. The manner in which they express themselves and the conversation they hold will simply blow your mind. When they speak, they are in depth with their analysis,their outlook is so refreshing, so real and their ultimate conclusion is well thought out.

Do not judge anyone merely because of their age or how they look.

Throw it out!

Food from the table of her mind

As we approach the Christmas season, my family and I decided to do our major cleaning. I think we scheduled all our major cleaning and so it was pretty much anticipated. However, we always find things that we are afraid to part with, this year was no different, but we had to be decisive

As we sort through bags and boxes we decided to stop. We had decided we were not going to look in another box or bag, instead we were just going to throw them out. Risky right? But it had to be done because we were hoarding things again. Things we had done without for years, but nostalgia wanted us to keep it

Similarly, in life, we tend to habor things that needs to be thrown out or just let go. We keep holding on the past hurt, past love that no longer loves us back and things that have no more value to it. Why? Because we keep reopening those “boxes” and having open them we feel the need to hold onto them. Even, if for years those things never bothered you the moment you stir up old things they come back to life.

I am not saying you should forget your past, I saying that there are some things that you have now outgrown and it needs to go and stay in the past. Stop clinging to that photo, stop clinging to that dress (you are no longer a size two), stop saying “if I knew”. Its time to be progressive and a part of being progressive requires you to releases those baggages that are weighing you down.

Aren’t you tired of the weight? Tired of the hate, the angry, the bitterness, the one sided love? Aren’t tired of starving herself to get back to that size 2? You are a size 10 or whatever and you are fantastic! Throw it out you will be fine.

Forgiveness

Food from the table of her mind

It was Lewis B. Smedes who said “To forgive is to set a prisoner free and discover that the prisoner was you”. In this world it is so easy to hold onto the hurt, the betrayal and the anger instead of letting go. As I put pen to paper to make my jottings, I recognize how easy it is to actually write or even say these words as opposed to doing it. But considering the benefits and freedom that comes with forgiving its worth taking the risk to try it.

Unforgiveness

While it may seem as though you have won by haboring unforgiveness, but you are actually loosing. You are involuntarily giving you heart more room to entertain hatred. You are also giving the person or persons who hurt you the permission to live in your heart. Carolyn Miller stated “Unforgiveness is a poison that shrivels the heart. It means a person cannot truly live in the present as they’re always thinking about the past”. The past is very important, but to constantly live in it and having it dictate your life is not acceptable.

When you forgive a person its not about them, it’s about you and your hearts. Its for you to be free, heal and grow. Conquer hate, never let hate conquer you.

Second Impression

Words that matter

In my heart of hearts, I believe that God lines up destiny and he align moments perfectly. A while back I met a doctor and my first impression was not good, it pretty much left a bitter taste in my mouth. While everyone would voice how much of a good person this doctor was, I remain too hooked on the past to even give the doctor the time of day to redeem himself. For a short time I was very petty.

Recently, I had another impression of this doctor, after I decided to move pass the incident and try to see the “good” in him. I can firmly say I am happy I did. He is a doctor who actually listens, take advise and is extremely thorough in is job, and as a health care worker this is well appreciated.

They say first impression last and I do believe this but I also believe that second impressions are important too and can be just as lasting.

Take a second look. Second impressions are just as good.

Friendship

Food from the table of her mind

For me, friendships are extremely important and I hold them very dear to my heart. So rest assured if I tell you that you are my friend, I mean it in every sense of the word and you are held in high regards in my heart. So you will understand when I say my circle of friends is small and my inner circle of friends is even smaller.

Your friends should want to see you win and level up, being the best version of yourself as much as possible. You need people in your circle who can motivate you on those days when you need some extra encouragement. They should cheer loudly for you especially on those days when you just want to throw in the towel.

Recently I express to one of my inner circle friends that I wanted to do something new. When she heard my idea she instantly became one of my biggest supporter. She said “I will promote you, I even have some (referring to the concept I had just shared) that I want you to try” . When I express one fear that I had she instantly destroyed that fear and said what you are bringing to the table is different. In your life you will need friends like this who will cheer so loudly for you that the very doubts or fears you had seem so obsolete.

Your Inner Circle Friends

The word inner already suggest the position of those friends hold. It speaks to a different level of closeness that they hold in your life. These are the persons that know you on a personal level that knows detailed information about you and in essences knows you extremely well. The reality is not everyone you call friend is at this level. Some are mere acquaintance, so stop giving unnecessary information to them and expecting certain behavior from these acquaintance. Know your circle and the people in it.

Know when to walk away

Some friendships can be toxic and you just need to leave. You don’t have to argue you can peaceful back away. Sweetie you cannot continue pouring into something that is not going anywhere. A friendship should not be one sided, it has to be two sided. When a friendship or relationship becomes a one sided thing then my dear just walk away. Always remember Choose people who choose you.